quote:Originally posted by Buttercup:
Judging by the influx of pro-spankers that always chime in on spanking threads, spanking is still going on. That means the number of children being spanked in this generation probably is the same as the last generation. I say that, not only because of the overwhelming responses that are pro-spanking, but because parents usually use the same discipline methods as their own parents.
So the number of children being spanked has not changed from our parents' generation to ours, yet we do have more violence in our schools, kids on drugs, etc. So there must be something else to contribute to the increase, right?
What makes sense to me (and from everything I've read) it is due to children being exposed - and early exposure at that - to incredible amounts of violence from t.v., Internet, video games, etc. I'm in my 30's and can only remember watching reruns of the Brady Bunch in the afternoons when I got home, and Bugs Bunny on Saturday mornings. (We didn't have cable and had about eight channels to choose from.) The rest of the time I was in my backyard building tree houses and making mud pies. You probably were too.
As for drugs, aside from Meth - which seems to be rampant everywhere - prescription drugs are abused by far more than cocaine or any other recreational drug. Why is that? How are kids getting these drugs? It's because almost everyone is on a flippin' anti-depressant now. Xanax, Zoloft, etc., etc., are grossly overprescribed. People don't want to deal with the root causes of their depression and use effective methods like cognitive therapy; they want to pop a pill. So Johnny sees those pills in the medicine cabinet and there you go....
Also, parents just aren't around for their children anymore. We've got far too many latchkey kids and that's just asking for trouble. In and ideal world, most moms I'm sure would love to stay home with their children, but because housing, automobiles, food, etc. cost so much in this damm country, moms have to work too. So if twelve-year-old Johnny's at home by himself from 3:00 to 5:30 in the afternoons, he's much more likely to find and take these drugs or get creative and start huffing on air freshener (something that is, sadly, also becoming common.)
So I veered a bit with that, but it all comes back to the points in your post. People are still spanking their children; the evidence is clear (and all over this thread), so you can't attribute lack of spanking to unruly kids. Also, and I've pointed this out before, there are plenty of people in jail in their 50's and 60's that were from the so-called "spanked" generation. So lack of spanking has nothing to do with it, it's lack of parenting and lack of boundaries.
But thanks for your post. I always enjoy your contributions.
While I dont contribute any of this to spanking or not spanking exclusively, I have to disagree with you about the number of children spanked. There are parts of this country (I've lived all over it) where it is not acceptable to swat your child in public. Period. You will get a visit from DHR because someone will call in a complaint. Although most are cleared, DHR is still required to make the visit when a complaint is called. Because of this, all over the country, I feel there is much less spanking today than in the past. And children from about 6 or 7 up know this and use it against their parents. I see it all the time. Parents are spanking less out of fear of having to explain themselves more than out of not wanting to spank. As I said, this is not seen here as much as many other places in the US, this being the bible belt and all.
I was a latchkey kid back in the mid to late 80's and early 90's. Latchkey children have been around for a long time (my father was a latchkey kid as well). What kept me in line (most of the time) during those few hours? Fear of what would happen if I didn't. Where did that fear come from? Discipline. Mine was a mixture of spanking, grounding, write offs (Id rather had a spanking), and whatever other method my parents could think of. I was brought up to 'respect' my parents. They werent my friends or my buddies, they were my parents and they acted like it.
With all the things that are changing and all the things that are going wrong, I know from personal experience that spankings work if used correctly. Do the studies you posted show different? Yep. But there were also studies once upon a time that said cigarette smoking was safe and that limiting the speed to 55 would save lives. Both turned out the be incorrect. So, todays studies could be easily proven incorrect tomorrow, while past experience never changes.
The point of my post was that, just like I dont critisize folks that dont spank their children because they believe it is wrong, I dont expect to be critisized because I think it is right. This issue is not an issue that affects the public in general, it is an issue that deals with my personal realtionship with my child and, in all honesty, its not anyone elses concern if someone wants to spank or not spank. Like I said earlier, there is nothing wrong with a person trying to explain their beliefs (as you have here, besides, anyone who knows me knows I like a good debate), its those that believe that someone is less of a parent or a person because they choose to spank that bother me.