quote:Originally posted by Buttercup:quote:Originally posted by Eastside:quote:Originally posted by Buttercup:quote:Originally posted by vplee123:quote:American Academy of Pediatrics - a group that is completely against spanking. Yes, I know, their views don't matter either.
I know plenty of Pediatricians that spank. Sometimes a good old fashioned paddle/hand/switch is in order..........to each his own.
You do, huh? Names?
If they endorse spanking, they are not members of the American Academy of Pediatrics or don't support the view of the vast majority of members.
The AAP has a membership of 60K pediatricians. If these "doctors" you know aren't members, they are seriously in the minority and one would have to wonder why they aren't affiliated with the AAP. Were they kicked out for some reason? Do they have valid licenses?
Yeah, Michael Jackson was under the care of a great physician too.
I'm confused -- are you implying that a pediatrician that endorses spanking is not fit to be a peditrician or should be removed from being a pediatrician? They are entitled to their opinions as well as any researcher is -- so I don't understand why them agreeing that a swat might be just what the doctor ordered just as much as an apple a day will keep the doctor away? My pediatrician didn't have a sign on his wall telling me spanking was the best discipline, but he also wasn't big on "time out" either. He's retired now, but he was a great physician and while he gave great advice -- he never said spanking was a bad thing. Then again, there is a major difference between a spanking and a beating -- spanking and the fear of worked for me and my siblings.
I see all your research, but just like with statistics -- you can make some things bend and twist to say anything you want it to say. How I discipline my child is my business and how my neighbor disciplines his child is his business. If he were physically abusing and sexually abusing his child -- I would report him.
Yes, I know research means nothing to some people except when it concerns drug trials or cancer break-throughs. Then those people pay attention to it.
But none of you - especially in this part of the country - will admit that you only spank your children because momma-and-daddy did and it's the only way you know. There is tons and tons of information about the research available supporting my position (so this isn't coming from Buttercup). There are so many BETTER alternatives to spanking. But it doesn't matter, it's not what momma-and-daddy did.
God himself could appear before some of you and tell you he didn't mean for you to take "Spare the rod...." literally, but you'd still spank because that's what momma-and-daddy did.
So go ahead, switch their little legs, tan their little behinds, make that belt mean some business because discipline isn't at all about the child or the child learning anything or the child's future; it's about the parents and what their own momma-and-daddy did.
Turn out more kids who are more likely to become violent as teenagers and adults; who are more likely to abuse their own spouses; who are more likely to be bullies, alcoholics, socially withdrawn. Go ahead, because that's what momma-and-daddy did.
You didn't respond to my question about the pediatrician -- I am curious if you truly think a ped that doesn't rail against the wrongs of spankings shouldn't be a ped?
I am curious though -- what alternatives would you recommend to spanking? What enlightening options are there that work every time so that I can never have to spank my child again, but I won't have to constantly be getting on to my child?
Two things: 1. I don't spank because Momma and Daddy did -- now you are the one making assumptions -- you are using "research" that has no "facts" to support it. 2. not every child that has been spanked is violent and truth be told that statistic is skewed, but since it is research -- whatever. I contract with a juvenile facility -- if you were to poll those kids -- yes you'd get a 100% violence rate to being spanked (40 kids violent and they will all say they were spanked), but if you poll my 7 year old's class room -- you'd get about a 5% violence rate (18 kids 1 kid is the violent one). Big difference in who you poll to get your statistics to fit the outcome of your research. These researchers go into this type of idea with preconceived conclusions and they use what benefits them and what doesn't is considered "insignificant" -- you that +/- 4% thing on most statistics. I pay attention to research but I know enough to know that it is not written in stone and that it has human hands in it so it cannot be taken as law. I give it its due if I don't know of something else in my life that contradicts it. But no one should ever take research as absolute and final. Period.
Yes, in some situations there are better alternatives, but one good swat stops most problems for a long time. No one spanks their child every day or even every week for that matter, but how many times a day do you have to put a child in time out? How many times a week do you have to send a child to their room? How many times a year do you have to take away that cell phone? How many times does your child have to "pull a red tab at school"? How long does it take for your child to "grow out" of their behavior when alternatives are used? How many more family arguments do you have to endure? I had a great childhood and I remember every spanking I got -- but I remember the loving family that I had right there with that. I was never spanked that I didn't know why I was spanked and I was never disciplined that I wasn't "talked to" before or after to make sure I understood.