question for Facebook users

I agree!

quote:

Originally posted by unclegus:
I agree!

I think it's creepy. I'm sorry the man passed away, but, I wouldn't do it. And I wouldn't want anyone to do that for me.

Maybe a picture of the deceased with them, but not just the deceased.

I too think it is a little weird, but folks grieve in different ways. If it helps someone handle the loss of a close personal friend or loved one, the best thing to do is to just to look over it. I saw a horse trailer this week which had a color picture of young girl on the back, dedicated to her memory, and I thought for a minute about how bad it looked, and then thought it could be her father's truck or something, and how he deals with this emotional roller coaster is not really mine to judge.
The best thing, IMO, is just to let it go, and hopefully it will not offend someone until these folks accept the loss and can move on with their life.
FB has created all inis of social "problems" for us, but in reality it just allows us to see that we are not all alike, and that despite all these things at are fingertips, we still don't really "communicate" nor understand one another.

I too think it is weird. People do grieve in different ways. I've never understood the need for roadside memorials, car stickers in memory of someone or newspaper ads. It is odd that people want to project their grief on others who don't even know them.

quote:

**** facebook is weird....mens who **** around on facebook is queerer than a mafaka

Seriously Times Daily? I mean come on......

It reminds me of these memorial stickers you see on people's cars. I mean wth? RIP Paw Paw 1910-2011. It isn't like Paw Paw didn't know it was coming.

I have told all my friends and family if anything ever happens to me don't dare make up those "In Memory of" car stickers. I don't want to have someone's car in my memory. I think that's just silly. If you want to do anything to remember me, get a tattoo or something. At least that shows real commitment. Don't dedicate your car that you will get rid of in 5 or 10 years to my memory....

quote:

Originally posted by BamaGirl82:
I have told all my friends and family if anything ever happens to me don't dare make up those "In Memory of" car stickers. I don't want to have someone's car in my memory. I think that's just silly. If you want to do anything to remember me, get a tattoo or something. At least that shows real commitment. Don't dedicate your car that you will get rid of in 5 or 10 years to my memory....

I would come back and haunt the person who put a car sticker in my memory!

Yeah but to each his own.

If these actions bring comfort to people who have family members. close friends die then why does that bother us?

Odd, creepy, eccentric or fill in the blank, I once considered doing the same thing. A relative passed last year and for a short period I thought of setting his picture as mine on FB. Never did.
Don't care for the rememerance/memorial pages on FB or involving the internet at all.
The car rememberances are tacky as are the roadside memorials. Certainly the people that maintain these sites have made the deceased's grave a beautiful garden.
Time, money, energy and other resources would be more beneficial and a greater honor when given to a charity done in a person's memory.

Personally, I think it's creepy. However, everybody does indeed grieve in different ways. My best friend and her husband had a motorcycle accident. She survived, he didn't. She left his voice on the home answering machine. When I asked her about it she said she just couldn't find it within herself to change it. Those of us who didn't want to hear it simply called her cell phone instead of her house phone. Eventually, in her own time, she took care of it.

quote:

Originally posted by Captain Obvious:
It reminds me of these memorial stickers you see on people's cars. I mean wth? RIP Paw Paw 1910-2011. It isn't like Paw Paw didn't know it was coming.

Even I had to laugh at that.

The stickers irk the hell out of me. I have known a few people on FB who have changed their pictures to a photo of the deceased WITH said FB user, but not the deceased alone. Which I think is fine.

I have been acquainted with a woman for years who uses a picture of her deceased newborn from 4 years ago as her picture for everything and I find that infinitely more disturbing, though as others have said, I wish to be more tolerant of others' grieving process.

In a similar vein I'm really bothered by the need for folks to take pictures of dying people. My mother almost died over the Christmas holidays and family members were taking photos of her on the freaking respirator for pete's sakes. Had I known about this I would have cracked down on all the visitors floating in and out of ICU.

quote:

Originally posted by BamaGirl82:
I have told all my friends and family if anything ever happens to me don't dare make up those "In Memory of" car stickers. I don't want to have someone's car in my memory. I think that's just silly. If you want to do anything to remember me, get a tattoo or something. At least that shows real commitment. Don't dedicate your car that you will get rid of in 5 or 10 years to my memory....

LIKE!
I have friends who promise to remove any roadside memorials erected for me. Hopefully, my spirit will have moved on to a better place and not hovering there. I'd rather people remember my life, not my death.

SashaFarce - creepier still - people used to take photos of their loved one in the coffin prior to the funeral and burial. I don't know why.

quote:

Originally posted by David L.:
I too think it is weird. People do grieve in different ways. I've never understood the need for roadside memorials, car stickers in memory of someone or newspaper ads. It is odd that people want to project their grief on others who don't even know them.

<like>

Hell, I'm so ugly people don't want to look at me now, and I ain't even dead yet.

When I was born my Momma asked the doctor if there was anything he could do. He said "we've done everything we can think of but we're afraid he's going to live.

I was so ugly my momma had to get drunk to breast feed me.

The doctor ordered me an incubator...with tinted windows.

quote:

Originally posted by canade:

quote:

Originally posted by BamaGirl82:
I have told all my friends and family if anything ever happens to me don't dare make up those "In Memory of" car stickers. I don't want to have someone's car in my memory. I think that's just silly. If you want to do anything to remember me, get a tattoo or something. At least that shows real commitment. Don't dedicate your car that you will get rid of in 5 or 10 years to my memory....

LIKE!
I have friends who promise to remove any roadside memorials erected for me. Hopefully, my spirit will have moved on to a better place and not hovering there. I'd rather people remember my life, not my death.

SashaFarce - creepier still - people used to take photos of their loved one in the coffin prior to the funeral and burial. I don't know why.

....I remember seeing some of those photos and I thought it was awful, even when I was a child.

quote:

Originally posted by SashaFarce:
Even I had to laugh at that.

The stickers irk the hell out of me. I have known a few people on FB who have changed their pictures to a photo of the deceased WITH said FB user, but not the deceased alone. Which I think is fine.

I have been acquainted with a woman for years who uses a picture of her deceased newborn from 4 years ago as her picture for everything and I find that infinitely more disturbing, though as others have said, I wish to be more tolerant of others' grieving process.

In a similar vein I'm really bothered by the need for folks to take pictures of dying people. My mother almost died over the Christmas holidays and family members were taking photos of her on the freaking respirator for pete's sakes. Had I known about this I would have cracked down on all the visitors floating in and out of ICU.

I had a brother to die at 4 years old of a mysterious illness which ended up being cancer. My mother and father kept a piece of his hair, took pictures of him in the hospital and in the coffin. Yes it was horrid to some people but that's just how we dealt with it. We still have his clothes, shoes, toys, and bed too. Everyone grieves in their own way.
I have a tattoo in memory of my brother but I wouldn't get a car memorial sticker for say mawmaw/papaw not because I don't love them but because they've lived their life. But hey to each is own. Some people thinks it's crazy that i got my tattoo but i feel like ya know it's my body.

Bluetick- Hilarious!!!!
I agree with the Car Stickers. Don't want to be remembered on what will eventually be someones old rusty dented Ford.

I had an acquaintance who was on FB pass away a few months ago. Lots of people went on his site and made comments like "miss you", " Glad we were friends", "You are at peace now", etc. It was obvious from the posts that this person had died. Someone actually posted "What happened to you?" on his page. I was wondering if they really expected a response from him......

When my 17 year old nephew was killed in a wreck, his mother was at the funeral showing off her new tatoo. Well, OK, I guess that's some people's way of dealing with grief. But then we had to drive by the spot he was killed at on the way from the funeral to the house for the after funeral "festivities". Everyone was beeping their horns when they drove by! It reminded me of when I was in high school and our team had just won a football game!

But the worst part was when we got to the house. They had pieces of the CAR on display! They had the bumper set up on an easel with his picture in the middle of it! It was weird, and to be honest, I found it to be disgusting.

Whatever...

quote:

Originally posted by Whosaidthat?:
Bluetick- Hilarious!!!!
I agree with the Car Stickers. Don't want to be remembered on what will eventually be someones old rusty dented Ford.

I had an acquaintance who was on FB pass away a few months ago. Lots of people went on his site and made comments like "miss you", " Glad we were friends", "You are at peace now", etc. It was obvious from the posts that this person had died. Someone actually posted "What happened to you?" on his page. I was wondering if they really expected a response from him......

If they don't have face book in heaven, I don't want to go!

quote:

Originally posted by Whosaidthat?:
I had an acquaintance who was on FB pass away a few months ago. Lots of people went on his site and made comments like "miss you", " Glad we were friends", "You are at peace now", etc. It was obvious from the posts that this person had died.

I've seen things like this too & don't get it. Do these people believe that by posting they miss her/him, the dead is going to be reading FB?

I know a lady that lost her Dad in a car wreck over 40 years ago. She still has his blood stained clothing hanging in her closet.

I wonder why this sudden proliferation of inappropriate grief statements. Roadside memorials. Bumper stickers. Etc. Reckon it's because so many are being cremated now and not leaving any sort of place for the bereaved to grieve? Or is the Princess Dianaesqe pop culture to blame?

I agree with whoever said donate money to a charitable fund or a good cause in the person's honor. I can even see getting a discreet tattoo to honor the loved one. But newspaper ads, billboards, face book tributes, and bumper stickers on back windows of pickups are all slightly crass.

I'm a FB user too. My profile picture is of me, not family or friends who have died. If there were out of touch friends looking for me on FB, I think they would be shocked to see a picture of a dead relative instead one of me.
Yes...to each his own. Whatever floats your boat.

quote:

Originally posted by semiannualchick:
I know a lady that lost her Dad in a car wreck over 40 years ago. She still has his blood stained clothing hanging in her closet.

OK...I thought the car parts on display was weird-But THAT'S just plain flakey.

quote:

Originally posted by Trutooit-II:
Maybe a picture of the deceased with them, but not just the deceased.

This would be my choice.

quote:

Originally posted by semiannualchick:
I know a lady that lost her Dad in a car wreck over 40 years ago. She still has his blood stained clothing hanging in her closet.

A very dear friend to a lot of us (HDB) died a little over a year ago, but i don't think any of us used his pic on our profiles? IMO, it would be creepy, and maybe disturbing to the family?

i talked to a friend, on the phone, about this today, again...
those same people are still just posting away.
meanwhile, my dead buddy is just staring at me....
it really gives me the "heebie jeebies".

ok.
i just saw this thread.
i feel the need to add:

FB photo - indeed, creepy.
'in memory' car decals, road signs, etc - extremly tacky. i know you love them. you have my sympathy. i'm sorry for your loss. but i don't know you or them and don't need to see it.

Papparazzi for the metabolicly challenged-
freakin WEIRD.. creepy and disturbing, bordering on sick. dead folk photos. /shudder.
my mom died a long time ago. at the visitation, some little woman was moving a chair around so she could use it to get above the coffin to get a snapshot.
there was almost bloody mayhem and havoc, but some one with her pull her out of the chair and out the door after i told the woman she'd need major surgery to get her camera out if she didn't remove her self from the building before i counted to 5.
i was a little irked. still dunno who she was. /shrug.

40 year old bloody death clothes?
ok. that IS sick.. unhealthy. and whacked.

once we die, we're gone.
whether you go the faithful or athiest route, the end result is the same - the vessel that was 'US' is empty.
and we aren't going to come back and read your windshield. people need to get a grip on this and let the empty shell go. keep the pics.. keep the memories.. wash the shirt.

i've told my family that if they stick my name on a car, i'm gonna come back from the dead and wizz in their gas tank every night until they take it off. the people who will care that i'm dead will know. the ones who don't know, won't care.

I've kept my dad's hunting clothes. They still smell like him....I know that may be strange or creepy to some, but it is comforting to me.

My brother died when he was only 13, I've put his baby picture as a profile pic on FB near his birthday.
Different strokes for different folks I guess, but I like keeping things that remind me of those that have passed. I'm not all psycho over any of it though.

ok, how strange would you consider it if the people were still using the picture for their profile?

they are!

I might find it strange, but what others do usually doesn't bother me.
I know someone that post picture of a girl that died in a car accident a few years ago! Every now and then I will see her picture. It grabs my attention for sure, but by now I know when I look I will see that xxxxx has changed his profile pic again.

quote:

Originally posted by thenagel:
and we aren't going to come back and read your windshield.

Believe it or not, had you died, and someone put a remembrance of you on their bumper or back window, they dont do it for you, they do it for themselves. Its how they cope with your death. Its a little reminder of you for when they think they are beginning to forget about you.

I say to each his own. Are some folks a little out there with how they handle grief? Of course. But I would be more worried about the folks that show no emotion......

Captain

quote:

Originally posted by Capt James T:

quote:

Originally posted by thenagel:
and we aren't going to come back and read your windshield.

Believe it or not, had you died, and someone put a remembrance of you on their bumper or back window, they dont do it for you, they do it for themselves. Its how they cope with your death. Its a little reminder of you for when they think they are beginning to forget about you.

well, jeez, i know that.. please excuse my sarcasm.

it doesn't change the fact that they are, in my opinion, tacky tacky tacky.

it's juts one more silly fad that'll go away soon. for a while the big thing was putting on a 300 buck muffler that made your honda sound liek a herd of west nile mosquitos. when i was a kid, the thing to do was put huge tires on the back and rasie the rear end of the car up. now you have to put thoes little skinny stupid looking tires on your so you look all Gangsta. for a while it was spinning hubcaps.

silly fads come and go, but the memorial bumper stickers just strike a nerve with me.. just seems to be truly tastless and low class.

in memory of
jimmy john
" big bad bubba"
johnson. 1897-2011.
he was taken before his time.
we love you Paw-Daddy

they want a reminder? put the sticker on the dash board so we don't have to see it. or better yet, put in o nthe bathroom mirror so they cna see it every day. if it's for them, wouldnt' that work better?

quote:

Originally posted by thenagel:
when i was a kid, the thing to do was put huge tires on the back and rasie the rear end of the car up.

Ahhh, five spoke deep dish Cragers...

Anyway, whats your opinion of bumper stickers? How about those little chrome fish symbols?