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Cop1: Has she performed oral sex on him?

Kyle: Yeah, I think so.

Cop1: Nice.

Cop2: Nice.

Cop3: Nice.

Detective: So, wait. What's the crime?

Cop: The crime is, she isn't doin' it with me!

Kyle: Hey! He's totally underage! She's taking advantage of him!

Detective: You're right, we're sorry. This is serious. We need to track this student down, and give him his Luckiest Boy in America medal right away.
Why did they mention Covenant Christian School??? When I first started reading the article, it made it look like she was a teacher there. I understand the call just involved CCS's parking lot - but, I'm sure I'm not the only one who thought that at first. Why didn't they just say police received a call to a Colbert parking lot???

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