I'll start.
A guy goes into a bar with a salamander on his shoulder. He says, "Bartender, a beer for me, and one for my friend Tiny."
The bartender has seen it all so he doesn't bat an eye, just pour two beers. They both (the guy and the salamander) drink up. Then the guy says, "I'll have another, and Tiny will too."
Bartender pours two more, but now he's getting curious. He asks the guy, "Well, it's none of my business, but I was just wondering why you call him Tiny."
The guy replies, "Well, he's my newt! (minute).
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